


Green vs. Green and Green

by Yatterqueen



Series: #wedgiewednesday [13]
Category: Unlisted
Genre: Gen, no tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-06-01 07:44:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6509131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yatterqueen/pseuds/Yatterqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I know I just said I should try something new but old habits die hard (and I can't think of anything else. Zatanna has no supporting cast, but I figure I can do Diana vs. Donna again). Here's Jen vs. Her Nieces, which is... very one sided. They <i>could </i>have had a chance if Carmilla didn't betray Lyra.</p><p>Anyway, Jen's a fourth-wall breaker, so I added some references to what she'd think about wedgies & wedgie stories without <i>directly </i>breaking the wall, offset by Ross the author (she legitimately is (or was)) in the beginning. The story about her and Titania she mentions is this one: <a href="http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/449211296">She-Hulk Vs Titania (Wedgie fight, request)</a> one of my personal favorites.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Green vs. Green and Green

**Author's Note:**

> I know I just said I should try something new but old habits die hard (and I can't think of anything else. Zatanna has no supporting cast, but I figure I can do Diana vs. Donna again). Here's Jen vs. Her Nieces, which is... very one sided. They _could_ have had a chance if Carmilla didn't betray Lyra.
> 
> Anyway, Jen's a fourth-wall breaker, so I added some references to what she'd think about wedgies & wedgie stories without _directly_ breaking the wall, offset by Ross the author (she legitimately is (or was)) in the beginning. The story about her and Titania she mentions is this one: [She-Hulk Vs Titania (Wedgie fight, request)](http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/449211296) one of my personal favorites.

 "You know, Carmilla ripped my favorite pair."

"Little menace. Lyra's no slouch either. I've lost at least three pairs of panties to those two. Wonder what they find so fun about it..."

Jennifer Walters and Betty Ross are walking back to Jen's after lunch. The conversation about the younger women of their apparent four-person comedy troupe came up after Betty reminded Jen about the wedgie she gave her over the sink.

"Well, I mean, it _is_ pretty fun," Ross says, eating some mini-sandwiches they took to go. "Not getting one, of course, but giving."

"Eh, if I could go through life without getting another one, I'd be fine."

"Wrong family, then. You started our fight last time too, so it's not like you go out of your way to avoid it, Jen."

Jen shrugs. _And I started that one with Thundra._ "Okay, okay, I'm not _blameless,_ Betty, but I'm just saying. Did you know there's websites dedicated to wedgies?"

"How do you mean? Like there are fan-websites?"

"Yeah, people really dedicated to it. I'd be surprised if Carmilla didn't turn out to be a member, how creative she can get."

Betty offers Jen a sandwich, concern and curiosity etched on her face. "Is it... a sex thing?"

"Not with Carm, I don't think. It'd be weird if it was. But with some people, yeah," she nods, grabbing the offered food. "I can't really say anything about it, though. I mean, I _do_ think it's kinda' weird but what people get off to is their own business."

"I suppose that's fair," Betty agrees. "What were you doing searching it up anyway?"

Jen munches a sandwich, nonchalant, and says, "Curiosity. Wanted to stay a step ahead of my nieces. There's lists of 'techniques' but what really gets me are the stories."

Betty grabs one of her sandwiches and raises a curious eyebrow, intrigued. "Stories?"

"Yeah, like... 50 Shades but with wedgies. In some cases, _worse_ than 50 Shades was. You've got your people trying to work out weird lesbian hate, your healthy dose of misogyny, but things like that you find anywhere."

" 'Nine-tenths of existing books are nonsense, and the clever books are the refutation of that nonsense.' Disraeli wasn't talking about erotica, but it applies. So, the remaining 10%?"

"Is there, I guess. Like I said, it doesn't do anything for me, so I wouldn't know what counts as 'good.' There's not a lot of stories either, so if 90% of 10 is bad, that means only 1 is good."

"You'd consider what good?"

"This is a weird spot to be on, Ross. You can tell some of it's by geeks who never touched a woman before --"

"Well, that's anything, anywhere."

"Yeah, I know. It's a _lot_ different than, like, your erotica."

Betty huffs, mocking indignation. " _My_ erotica? I'll have you know I'm a serious author, Jennifer Walters."

"Please, Betts, I've read your stuff. Some of it is _gratuitous_."

"Well, I never," Betty says, mocking southern accent that gets both women to laugh.  

"Anyway, so, for example I know the internet has a weird fascination with me and Shuma-Gorath, or even with me and my cousin -- _yuck_ \-- but occasionally, there's a good picture. Weird to see myself drawn fucking a coworker but, y'know, at least I look happy to be there."

Betty nods, urging Jen to continue.

"And with this, I'm never asking to get a wedgie -- I mean, they range from anything from just fun pranks between friends or... I've seen a story about me and Titania? Like I said, really weird but at least, I get Mary back and win. And it's not like that's something she wouldn't do. Matter of fact, I think she has at one point, actually. Also, underwear's a big thing in that niche, but only sometimes it's something I would actually wear. I know they don't know a lot about me, so they're always just making it up but sometimes, I'm just a body in whatever's happening, not a fully-functioning person. I exist as some dude's fetish puppet. In other cases, well..."

"They're _thinking._ "

"With _more_ than their dicks, yeah."

"On that opposite side of the scale, I'm assuming it's less than fun to read."

"The _worst_. I mean, you can just write you hate strong women in all caps and achieve the same effect."

"It's not _that_ bad, is it?"

Jen knocks on her door. She has the key, she just wants to see if anyone's home. Figuring they're not by the lack of response, she puts the key in.

"Not intentionally," she answers. "At least, I don't think so. Like I said, they're thinking with their dicks."

"Fair enou..."

The pair of women walk in to see Lyra hanging off the dull hook on the wall adjacent to the door by her red underwear and Carmilla with a new pair of Cookie Monster panties stretched over her head.

Jen winces and helps her She-Hulk niece down while Betty tends to Carmilla. "You two are relentless."

Carmilla shrugs, stuffing her underwear back into her jeans. "It's fun."

"Fun? You have _fun_ with your panties over your head?"

"Okay, _no,"_ she points to Lyra. "Fighting with bighead over there, though?"  

Lyra nods, holding onto Jen for support until she regains some feeling in her legs. "It's a chess match with panties. Of course, getting one is no fun, but the point is to avoid it."

Betty looks over at Jen. "Like we said earlier."

Carmilla snorts. "You two were talking about it?"

"Yeah," Jen admits, making sure Lyra can stand and goes into the kitchen to put the leftovers in the fridge. "You know people write stories about it?"

"Yeah, of course I did. Where do you think I get my ideas? I mean, I don't spend all day coming up with ways to wedgie you guys -- I _steal_ it."

Lyra did not and looks confused. She leans over to Betty and whispers, "Are these stories good?"

Betty whispers back, "It depends."

"I never read anything with you, though," Carmilla says. "I learned my lesson after that Shuma-Gorath story."

Lyra looks to Betty and Betty quickly shakes her head no, she does not want to know.

"We _all_ did that day," Jen says solemnly. "I think this wedgie thing has become a weird family bonding exercise."

"My mother said you wedgied her the other day."

Jen doesn't look back at Lyra but she holds up a hand. "Okay, well, Thundra was -- hey!"

In revenge for Thundra, Lyra gives Jen a wedgie right in front of the fridge, pulling her away from it.  

Betty comes, originally to help, but then she looks at the wedgie Jen is getting, and just picks up the dropped food.

"Purple, Aunt Jen, _again?_ "

"Who was hanging by _red_ underwear?"

Her mouth earns her another strong yank by Lyra, who motions for Carmilla to come help her. While Carmilla has no strong feelings about Thundra, she can't pass up the opportunity to wedgie her aunt. She grips the purple full-backs and pulls to the right, while Lyra pulls to the right. They equalize their strength, so Jen's just being split in half.

"Let me go, you two!"

Lyra looks at Carmilla who looks at her and they rear back with all their strength and then let the underwear snap back. Before Jen can pick it out, they smooth out the fabric over her white blouse.

"Got you good, huh?" Carmilla teases, getting out of dodge. Lyra moves too.

"You two asked for this," Jen says, fixing her underwear. "Just remember that."

It comes down to who she can catch first, and Carmilla, thinking she can get away, paralyzes Lyra's leg, exposed by her shorts, and leaves her behind.

Lyra turns to look at Jen, who suddenly stands much taller than she does.

"Carmilla, I'm going to get you back for this..." Lyra whispers.

"After your ass recovers, _sweetie_."

Lyra tries to reach for Jen's underwear, but her hand is knocked away and Jen pulls on her shorts, using them to spin her around. She reaches for the already stretched out red panties and pulls as hard as she can without ripping them, lifting Lyra high into the air.

Carmilla and Betty wince in sympathy while Lyra bites her lip, trying not to scream. Jen bounces her a few times and looks directly at Carmilla, indirectly telling her she's next. To finish Lyra off, she puts the legholes of the red panties on her shoulders and then hangs her off the hook.

"Aunt Jen, get me down!" Lyra demands, kicking her legs weakly and holding the front of her underwear down.

"Shh, Lyra."

Betty holds her hands up when Carmilla hides behind her.

"Carm, give up," Jen says.  

"Can I apologize first?"

"Sure, go ahead."

"I'm sorry. Can we hug it out?"

Jen plays Carmilla like a fiddle, pretending to soften. She even hugs her for a good minute. But when she feels Carmilla's stinger on her arm, she heaves back, pulling the stretched out Cookie Monster panties high up Carm's back and making her scream.

She sets her niece down and turns her around, pulling her underwear right under her nose. Carmilla desperately tries to take it off but Jen shuts that down and stuffs her arms in the legholes, punctuating it by pushing her down. "You're a bully!" Carmilla yells, rolling around. "Big green coke-bottle shaped bully!"

Victorious, Jen looks at her trapped nieces and then, figuring that's going to be it for a while, frees them.  Lyra limps onto the couch and Carmilla just lays on the floor. They'll go back after her later, Jen's sure, but for the time being, she's won this fight.

Jen turns to Betty, who stands there permanently wincing. "These are the kind of stories I prefer. When I kick my family's ass at them."


End file.
